Archive for March, 2006

Clockin’ in for the day.

Wednesday, March 29th, 2006

It’s day 5. Things look better. Yesterday I hung out with Rich, danced, watched him work, parked and unparked the fiero with him, danced, listened to music, and rode the ferry.. love that boat.

Love ya all.

Music: U.S.E. – Night Shift


Wednesday, March 29th, 2006

This is.. I wish I knew which day # it was. I’m going to have to start logging my pills using something a little more serious than ‘Sheer’s memory’. Livejournal might not be a bad idea.. man, sometimes it scares me trusting my journal to someone else, but, really, it’s not unreasonable to do a little teamwork in creation of good tools. Many hands make light work.

My search queue contains:

Cyndi Lauper – Time After Time. That one makes me cry a whole lot. Then I go for the eyedrops.

All the others are mysteeriously (um, yah) .. they’re out there.

Day 3.

Tuesday, March 28th, 2006

Because I’m determined to do 365 days clean & sober, ‘for real this time’.. (I made a promise with *. That’s probably one I don’t want to try breaking. * can, well, maybe help take away my fear that I’ll lose my home.).. I’m going to count down the days on my livejournal. Each day I will contact one of my RL friends, if possible meeting them in person. This will help me reestablish my time sense and other neural connections, and help me heal in ways that are nontechnical. Maybe not even describable. Who knows. I hurt myself badly this time.


Friday, March 17th, 2006

I am officially on drugs. Or perhaps that should be on official drugs.

After a visit to a shrink, I’ve been prescribed a circadian rhythm regulator (which may explain why I’m awake at 9:30a) and a mood stabalizer. We’ll see if either or both improve things over the long run.


Monday, March 13th, 2006

So ignore my excessively dramatic and annoying journal entries of recent.


The voting network..

Sunday, March 12th, 2006

The problem we have in building a honest and reliable voting network is that we’ve got a couple of opposing goals.

First of all, we’d really like to be able to test that every single vote arrived in it’s appropriate bucket, and no single user voted more than once. These things would seem, on the surface, to require some form of good authentication and user-tagging.

But on the other hand, we really want users to feel free to vote their concience, without worrying that other people might find out what they’ve voted. This would seem to require a completely anonymous system.

Then there’s the matter of tallying the votes. Ideally, we would like each vote to be sent several places for tallying, rather than tallied at one place, and the results of the tallies compared.

I really think that, especially given that this is new technology that will by its very nature be buggy, and in some sense at least the fate of the world rests on the results of this system (one could argue that that’s true of any system because everything is so interconnected, but I think in this case it’s more true than in most) we need the ability to verify our votes after they have been posted. This will require us to have some way to authenticate ourselves to the network – I’m thinking something like a ATM card, issued to every voter, with their name and SSN encoded on it. It could probably even just be a magstripe on a conventional ID like a drivers license.

Anyway, some completely anonymous (as far as any outside snoop could see) token should be either assigned to or generated out of the name and SSN, and attached to the ‘envalope’ of the ballot. That way the user could go home and with their web browser, hit up and verify that their vote was in fact sitting there, and had been counted.

Also, because this is completely new technology, I think it’s important that it be open-source. The open-source community would probably rally around a project to build a voting machine network that was honest using nothing but PCs, and because it was open-source it would be possible to verify that it had not been coded to favor any particular canidate in any way.

[At the moment, the situation we have is that the vice president of the u.s. has stock in the government-favored electronic voting machine company Diebold.. if anyone knows of something that smells more of conflict-of-interest than that, please don’t tell me about it because I’m really afraid to know]

Bleh. Must go shower. More later.

Positive steps..

Wednesday, March 8th, 2006

I’m trying to document positive things that I’m doing, mostly just to give me some hope that the future is going to look brighter than the past

1) Psychologist
2) Psychiatrist
3) Cleaning house
4) Installed and using calandering system on Gateway
5) Couples counselling
6) Oxygen
7) Filing system and organizers for office (though still much to do in that realm)

Right now I’m feeling really sad and broken and things with Kayti are not feeling like they’re going well..

Happy happy. etc.

Monday, March 6th, 2006 is fixed. It wasn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be – I faxed them my license last night, today they emailed me with my username and password, and me and enyc made a few changes here and there and we’re back on the net. Happy happy.


Loving something as it is..

Sunday, March 5th, 2006

We tear each other up, wanting each other to be something different or to do something different or to become someone different or to be new and improved in this or that or the other way.

Why can’t we love each other just the way we are?


Saturday, March 4th, 2006

I forsee much running around in circles tomorrow.

Hammernode, who have been doing primary DNS for for just about forever, have folded up shop. I don’t remember the username and password that the account is registered under, and I have to change the authoritive nameservers because right now, they point to localhost. (Ha. ha. ha. ha.). Oh, and the email address that I would use to get new information from them – currently registered @ WHo’s bright idea was that? Oh, right, mine..

I have a dns server set up on, so creating the zone isn’t that difficult, but I have to fax a photo ID before they’ll send me my username and password.

Amazingly, while normally this would be leaving me feeling crushed and depressed and stressed out, right now I find that I’m just not that worried about it. So the domain will be down for a day. It won’t be the end of the world.

I think I’m finally recovering from dot com madness.

Now, to figure out how to like myself.

(occasionally I wonder if I should transfer to Phoebe, since she’s the one who’s family was the origins of the name. THe problem is that I’m not sure she’s got a authorative nameserver to park it at, a webserver to host it on, or a mail server to deal with traffic on it. Or all that much interest in dealing with any of these things. But, at this point I have to concede that if she’s ready to deal with the technical challenges involved with the name and she wants it, it’s really more hers than mine)

I’ll have to come up with a new name for my consulting business at that point, though.