Never been one to let the carrier drop

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Parking meters are driving me nuts. How of course wants his code and he wants it now.. actually, the list of people who want their (whatever) and they want it now has gotten inmpressively long. I need to start charging more, and taking on less clients.

If I stop and think about how behind I am on everything, I can’t even deal with the thought of continuing to work .. stress just sort of overwhelms me. So I’m carefully trying to find some stress management techniques.

To add to the fun, now I’m getting sick ;-( I think it’s the smog or something.. or maybe it’s the fact that people keep calling me.. i got woken up this morning at 9, 10, and 11 am.. i swear I’m just going to start turning off my cell phone. I’m not on call, people, you don’t have the right to harass me..

I’m going to take a bath, and then get back to the (sigh) parking meters (sigh)

I can tell that I’ve made the big time because my music is now on iTunes. 😉 [Of course, it’s via a pay-to-publish service, but hey, what’s wrong with a little vanity publishing? Actually, I have high hopes of selling enough copies to pay back the pay-to-publish fees, optimist that I am.]

I think that it might be that we could significantly improve the human condition by adding another dimension of conjigation to english verbs. The dimension  would indicate whether the statement being said was fact, conjecture, or fiction. If children  learned a language which had this designed into this from birth, they would always be able to tell when they were speaking truth and when they were speaking fiction, and it would be natural to always include the conjigation in their speech. This would set us free from the curse of ‘unintended lying’ – cases where we speak conjecture and it’s taken as truth, or cases where we tell lies as a defense mechanism because of our fears. (More about this later)

I realize that designing a new language and getting it adopted would be a considerable challenge – consider the difficulty we’ve faced in deploying IPv6, for example – but the improvement in quality of life for all of us could be staggering. Lies (fictions that are taken as fact) are currently emotionally draining to the liar and can be extremely damaging to those who love the one who lies.

It took me a long time to learn to speak without lying when I was afraid. I assume most children go through this, and some of them may have much more difficulty than others. I’ve seen the damage and destruction that lies can do, and I’ve seen the emotional exhaustion that trying to keep up with which story was told to who can cause. I think having markers built into the language would be extremely helpful.

So, I’m trying to decide if I should continue to publish everything I record, or if I should start being more picky and only publish the things that I still like when I’m done recording them. I recorded something today that I have doubts about sharing..

it’s also pretty clear that if I keep going, I’m going to end up with like fifty songs from 2010. I think the practice is good for me, though.

Stand

Stand, stand togeather
Walking hand in hand in hand by the sea
Stand, stand forever
travelling onward farther than I can see

I never knew something was missing
I never saw what I was or could be
Then one day my heart flew far away from there
Far away from the pain and the misery

You are something amazing (amazing you)
Something real inside you calls out to me
You are there forever (and always)
Friends on the path to unravel life’s mystery

Stand, stand togeather (forevermore)
Walking hand in hand in hand by the sea
Stand, stand forever (and always shall be)
travelling onward farther than I can see

Love You

I love the smell of you                                     I breathe you
The sweet spicy scent of you
I love the feel of you                                         all of you
As you touch your lips to mine

I love the warmth of you                                 I hold you
The feeling I get when I hold you
Love the summer sunshine of you              all of you
washing through my mind

I love the taste of you                                        I taste you
The salt and the spice so nice of you
I love to dive into you                                       all of you
And bury myself deep inside

I love the thought of you                                I love you
Enfolding me with all you do
I love the feel of your body                            all of you
moving in rhythm with mine

I love the sound of you                                 I hear you
The sound of your voice ring so true
I love when you moan so sweetly              all of you
Feeling pleasure divine

I love the things you say                                I want you
You are so beautiful in every way
I love the things you do                                 all of you
Like poetry without the rhyme

I love the look of you                                       I watch you
All softness and curves and eyes so blue
I love the feel of you                                         all of you
Feeling so right all the time

I love how safe I feel with you                         I trust you
How I can say anything to you
There’s nothing I have to hide from you      all of you
Hiding from you would be a crime

With all we say and all we do                        I love you
Can there be any doubt that I love you
My heart and mind lie open to you            All of you
I would share with you my last dime

I thought both of the last two tracks deserved a little more explanation. Homeless was written by Megan Devoy – she asked me to take a poem she had written and put music to it. Because the free-form nature didn’t really lend itself to a conventional piece, I pulled out one of my favorite tricks, Spoken Word. Yay. I love those.

Dream Delayed started out as a very different song – in fact, two very different songs. But it just wouldn’t be anything than what it is – apparently this was the time for this song, and it didn’t want to be kept down. So I let it out. I haven’t decided how I feel about it.

It has one line in it that I really love… ‘Our dream that got delayed’. Those of you who know my life history know exactly what events, and who, this is about. The rest of you will just have to wonder until I write my autobiography. (Heh. Like that will happen.)

Dream Delayed

Fiber stretches
Across the miles
Carrying words between me and you

Words bring hope
Hope for a future
Closer together, a dream come true

walking along in disillusion
And my world turned over one day
saw what I was missing
when love comes
don’t turn the other way

I was sick
Lost within me
I was walking blind

I was dead
Dark within me
Now there’s a light that shines

I fight fear
Every day closer
To walking unafraid

In your eyes
I hope to find it
Our dream that got delayed

Just a quick li’l peice of work, based on a poem written by Megan.

Homeless