As usual..
I lack enough power to make it through the flight. I did get a chance to (via my cell phone) get the address of the hotel, so there’s nothing critical not happening.
I can’t keep track of what day it is. I think 27.
My life has been exhausting lately. I keep hoping things will settle down to a more managable pace, but as of yet it hasn’t happened.
Met with my lawyer today. Well, not really my lawyer because he’s leaving the firm in a week. But he took my information, radiated general legal competence, and I have high hopes for this firm actually figuring out a solution to my legal woes. Or at least, I can hope.
I’ve figured out why my dad saying the universe doesn’t owe me a living angers me: I didn’t ask to be created, and I am not permitted [or at least strongly discouraged] from ceasing to exist. Given that these things are true, it would seem that the universe does indeed owe me a living. And he is directly responsable for that.
I keep wondering.. in some previous life, prior to now, did I ask to be here, to watch friend after friend die, to experience system after system of my body failing, to experience pain and loss and suffering? Is it ever moral to have children, given the dark sides of the world that we are bringing them into? Is it moral to expect our children to work, given that they didn’t ask to exist? To ask them to give up their dreams in order to work on projects they don’t care about or even actively dislike? (i.e. parking meters – if I could make every parking meter in the world dissapear by waving a magic wand, I’d start waving. Actually, that probably applies to every form of currency as well. I’m not against money as a basic concept for energy exchange, but I am getting awfully sick of some of the fruits of capitolism as it’s currently implimented. Starting out with, why do all of the professionals I’m seeing, who don’t actually have any more hours of training than I do, get paid more than I do? In the meantime, why does my friend Tory, who’s every bit as worthwhile as a human, get paid less? It’s sick, people, and it needs to be put out of it’s misery. Especially in the case of CEOs who draw millions of dollars of pay.)
My basic choice was either stay under parents who tried to apply the morals their religion specified on me, despite the fact that I rejected that religion – or get out and work, at that time for $2/hr. I chose, obviously, to get out and work. But I find that on some level I harbor some anger for the whole situation.
I feel kind of like humans are intrensically selfish. Having children, for example, is a selfish act – most of the time you want them to conform to your ideals of what a ideal human is, which leads to many fights between parents and children. I don’t think that parents should have any authority over children. But then, I reject all authority in general unless it is operating in a advisary capacity. You all may have the might to throw me in jail, beat me, kill me, deprive me of my possessions, or in general make my life miserable. That doesn’t mean that it is right to do any of those things, any more than it would be right for me to do them to any of you. This would seem self-evident.
If I could destroy every government on earth without hurting any of the humans that are the component parts of those governments, I would probably do that also.
Can you tell I’m in a bad mood today?
Every government should come with a built in mechanism by which the governed can request a re-authoring or update of the government and governing documents. THis isn’t saying that any of the people involved in the government should be hurt, although in many cases they should be removed from power. However, every government suffers from some basic weaknesses. Any time one human attempts to order another human about, bad things are going to happen.
I can’t decide if I’m green, liberetarian, or anarchist. I have a little bit of each in me – for example, I don’t think it is correct for me to take actions which poisen the enviornment that we all have to live in, or use up resources wantonly that our children and their children and their children will need. But in terms of drug laws, and ‘blue code’ laws, and laws concerning who can and can’t marry, and things like that, I’m strongly anarchist. You shouldn’t be able to tell me I can’t marry someone that is the same gender that I am, marry multiple people, or marry my dog, cat, or dolphin. And you should be ashamed of yourself for trying, those of you out there who support such insanity.
I’ve been thinking of a project – a web site that allowed members of the internet community at large to vote on passages from the bible. Basically, the idea is, there is some good content there. However, there’s a lot of passages that I could, honestly, do without reading. There’s a lot of darkness, negativity, genocide, etc. I want to see a book that contains reasonable advice for life, ajusted for modern technology (birth control, condoms, etc) and cutting out all sexism, agism, genderism, sexual-orientation-ism, and in general all of the text that offends my egalitarian beliefs. I’m not demanding that anyone read this tome, but I think it would be neat to have a community resource that enabled it to be authored.
One possibility I’ve thought of is dumping the bible into a wiki, and then publishing the location via google and sitting back to watch the fun. But I’m not sure that this would achive what I’m trying to achive, so somewhat better tuned software might be in order.
I admit, it’s not a huge priority. But I wish *someone* would do it.
Okay, that’s enough of my bad attitude for the moment.
Actually, one more comment. I seem to have different opinions on some subjects every day. So all of the above text is subject to change without notice, at least in terms of my attitudes about the world.